1 00:01:41,080 --> 00:01:44,675 The tank itself was unusual in that it was vertical... 2 00:01:44,840 --> 00:01:46,671 and looked like an old boiler. 3 00:01:47,320 --> 00:01:49,550 Inside the tank, the subject wore a heavy glass bubble... 4 00:01:49,640 --> 00:01:52,234 and you would have thought the whole contraption uncomfortable... 5 00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:53,389 to say the least. 6 00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:55,038 It was, however, effective. 7 00:01:55,400 --> 00:01:59,109 Of the 23 students tested, only two found the experience unpleasant. 8 00:01:59,480 --> 00:02:01,391 Some even called it exhilarating. 9 00:02:01,480 --> 00:02:03,550 A number of students hallucinated. 10 00:02:04,360 --> 00:02:07,875 Dr. Jessup found the encephalographic evidence especially interesting. 11 00:02:08,280 --> 00:02:11,431 And one Saturday afternoon, in April 1967... 12 00:02:11,520 --> 00:02:14,114 he decided to try the experience for himself. 13 00:03:38,400 --> 00:03:40,755 Arthur. Hey, Arthur. 14 00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:43,148 Are you there? 15 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:45,153 Can you hear me, Arthur? 16 00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:48,679 Arthur, answer me. 17 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:52,353 Is that it? You want me to come in and get you out? 18 00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:54,635 Yeah. 19 00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:58,230 I want to get a look at those EEG tracings. 20 00:04:45,760 --> 00:04:46,875 Come on, mate. 21 00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:48,188 How do you feel? 22 00:04:48,520 --> 00:04:49,748 Not bad. 23 00:04:50,080 --> 00:04:52,230 I hallucinated like a son of a bitch. 24 00:04:52,480 --> 00:04:55,597 A variety of dream states, mystical states... 25 00:04:55,680 --> 00:04:58,240 a lot of religious allegory, mostly out of Revelation. 26 00:04:58,320 --> 00:05:00,038 You were in there close to five hours. 27 00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:01,515 It felt like an hour. 28 00:05:01,600 --> 00:05:03,113 I'd like to try that myself sometime. 29 00:05:03,200 --> 00:05:04,679 You should. You'll like it. 30 00:05:08,200 --> 00:05:09,792 Did we have any communication? 31 00:05:10,080 --> 00:05:12,594 Sure. I kept checking you out like you told me to. 32 00:05:13,360 --> 00:05:14,588 How did I respond? 33 00:05:15,280 --> 00:05:18,238 Very orderly. At one point you were crying. 34 00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:19,673 You mean, actually crying? 35 00:05:19,760 --> 00:05:21,876 You were sobbing. There were tears on your face. 36 00:05:22,080 --> 00:05:25,152 When I asked you what was going on, you said you were... 37 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:27,276 re-experiencing your father's death. 38 00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:30,635 Did you make notes? 39 00:05:30,720 --> 00:05:32,358 It's all there. 40 00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:34,318 I'd like to try this again next week, Arthur. 41 00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:36,516 Do you think you could make it again next week? 42 00:05:37,200 --> 00:05:38,599 What are we looking for? 43 00:05:39,560 --> 00:05:42,313 I don't know, yet. 44 00:05:44,000 --> 00:05:46,833 There's really very little literature on this kind of research. 45 00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:49,957 There's some good people in the field, Tart, Ornstein and Deikman... 46 00:05:50,040 --> 00:05:53,157 but most of it is radical-hip stuff, drug-culture apologias. 47 00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:56,437 Obviously, the first thing to do is set up some sensible methodology... 48 00:05:56,520 --> 00:05:59,637 see if we can't study these experiences under controlled laboratory conditions. 49 00:05:59,720 --> 00:06:02,075 It will not interfere with the work we're doing with Hobart. 50 00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:05,357 Well, what are we getting into? A new sensory deprivation? Isolation studies? 51 00:06:05,440 --> 00:06:07,715 I mean, you know, where will we be going with the tank stuff? 52 00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:10,439 We're not writing up a grant. Strictly bootlegging, just for kicks. 53 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:13,318 As long as we've got the use of this tank, let's play around with it. 54 00:06:13,400 --> 00:06:15,231 Let's find out where it takes us. 55 00:06:15,600 --> 00:06:18,353 It's fascinating stuff, Arthur. I think we ought to get into it. 56 00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:23,669 I didn't even know they had one of those isolation tanks at New York Hospital. 57 00:06:23,760 --> 00:06:25,796 Must be some guy in the psychology department... 58 00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:27,871 doing sensory deprivation studies. 59 00:06:28,480 --> 00:06:30,516 What's Jessup doing with it? 60 00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:34,556 You've got me. He's been taking students out of his classes and testing them. 61 00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:36,995 Think he's been doing this for three, four months. 62 00:06:37,400 --> 00:06:39,391 -Did you know... -Arthur. 63 00:06:39,520 --> 00:06:40,794 ...Jessup was into this kind of stuff? 64 00:06:40,880 --> 00:06:42,518 Not till you just told me. 65 00:06:42,600 --> 00:06:43,828 What do you want, honey? 66 00:06:43,920 --> 00:06:45,876 How long are you going to let it ring? 67 00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:48,319 It's okay, I'll get it. 68 00:06:48,640 --> 00:06:50,153 He's the last guy in the world I figured... 69 00:06:50,240 --> 00:06:51,468 to be screwing around with anything... 70 00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:53,357 as flaky as altered states of consciousness. 71 00:06:53,440 --> 00:06:57,194 Well, let's face it. Jessup is pretty flaky himself. 72 00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:00,549 That's him. 73 00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:23,631 Arthur says you're very shy. He wants me to draw you out. 74 00:07:23,960 --> 00:07:26,110 Draw me out? That doesn't sound like Arthur. 75 00:07:26,600 --> 00:07:29,876 Well, what he actually said was you were a high-handed, arrogant prick. 76 00:07:30,360 --> 00:07:31,873 A little nuts, but brilliant... 77 00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:35,111 and that if I ever got you talking, I would find you fascinating. 78 00:07:35,760 --> 00:07:37,034 That sounds more like Arthur. 79 00:07:37,240 --> 00:07:38,798 He says you're doing some work with him... 80 00:07:38,880 --> 00:07:40,598 -and Alan Hobart at Payne Whitney. -Yes. 81 00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:41,954 What sort of work? 82 00:07:42,680 --> 00:07:43,999 Toxic metabolite stuff. 83 00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:46,196 We're replicating Heath's and Friedhoff's strategies... 84 00:07:46,280 --> 00:07:48,669 trying to find maverick substances specific to schizophrenia. 85 00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:50,796 I think we're chasing our tails. What do you do? 86 00:07:50,880 --> 00:07:53,519 I'm a physical anthropologist. I'm sweating out my dissertation. 87 00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:55,556 -Where? -Columbia. 88 00:07:55,640 --> 00:07:57,437 Holloway and that bunch. 89 00:07:57,840 --> 00:08:00,229 You're kind of young for a Ph.D., aren't you? 90 00:08:00,320 --> 00:08:01,389 l' m 24. 91 00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:02,833 That's still pretty good. 92 00:08:02,920 --> 00:08:06,959 I didn't get my Ph.D. till I was 25 and I'm supposed to be a whiz kid. 93 00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:09,199 I'm a whiz kid, too. 94 00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:17,436 Anthropology seems to attract good-looking women. 95 00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:23,956 So you don't think schizophrenia can be reduced to a single etiological agent? 96 00:08:24,680 --> 00:08:26,352 I'm not even sure it's a disease. 97 00:08:26,760 --> 00:08:29,433 You think madness is simply another state of consciousness? 98 00:08:29,600 --> 00:08:31,909 There's a body of evidence to support that. 99 00:08:33,360 --> 00:08:35,669 You don't like to talk about your work, do you? 100 00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:37,269 As a rule, no. 101 00:08:42,480 --> 00:08:44,948 I've always been interested in interior experiences... 102 00:08:45,040 --> 00:08:46,439 especially the religious experience. 103 00:08:46,520 --> 00:08:48,556 The only reason I'm working with schizophrenics now... 104 00:08:48,640 --> 00:08:52,394 is that religious experience is so significant in schizophrenia. 105 00:08:52,840 --> 00:08:54,432 There's only so much you can do with animals. 106 00:08:54,520 --> 00:08:56,431 I worked with monkeys, but monkeys can't tell you... 107 00:08:56,520 --> 00:08:57,953 what's going on in their consciousness. 108 00:08:58,040 --> 00:08:59,473 You need human beings for that. 109 00:08:59,920 --> 00:09:01,399 You're not allowed to ablate human beings... 110 00:09:01,480 --> 00:09:03,391 and you can't stick electrodes in their skulls... 111 00:09:03,480 --> 00:09:05,710 so I have to use some kind of trance-inducing technique... 112 00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:08,109 and the isolation tank seemed the least risky. Listen... 113 00:09:08,200 --> 00:09:11,192 I'd like to go home with you tonight. Would that be all right with you? 114 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:16,072 I've got a roommate. We'll be confined to the living-room couch. 115 00:09:17,360 --> 00:09:19,157 What's wrong with the living-room couch? 116 00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:21,710 You tend to slip off a lot. 117 00:09:22,720 --> 00:09:24,039 I'm sure we'll manage. 118 00:09:24,640 --> 00:09:25,868 Yeah, I'm sure we will. 119 00:09:29,480 --> 00:09:32,074 So, whenever you want to go there, you let me know. 120 00:09:34,120 --> 00:09:35,633 How about right now? 121 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:51,598 What are you thinking about? 122 00:09:51,920 --> 00:09:52,989 God. 123 00:09:55,280 --> 00:09:56,838 Jesus, crucifixions. 124 00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:02,076 As a rule, do you usually think about... 125 00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:05,197 Christ and crucifixions under sexual stress? 126 00:10:11,840 --> 00:10:14,434 When I was nine years old, I used to see visions... 127 00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:18,358 visions of saints and angels, even Christ himself. 128 00:10:21,680 --> 00:10:23,511 Of course, I don't do that anymore... 129 00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:29,599 not since I was 16. 130 00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:32,239 Were your parents religious? 131 00:10:33,160 --> 00:10:34,388 Anything but. 132 00:10:34,960 --> 00:10:38,589 My father was an aeronautical engineer. My mother, a clinical psychologist. 133 00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:39,908 What happened? 134 00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:44,359 I mean, how did a little kid who saw visions of Christ turn into a physiologist... 135 00:10:44,440 --> 00:10:46,396 teaching at the Cornell Medical College? 136 00:10:46,880 --> 00:10:48,108 I stopped believing. 137 00:10:48,560 --> 00:10:49,834 It was very dramatic. 138 00:10:49,920 --> 00:10:53,879 My father died a protracted and painful death of cancer. 139 00:10:55,720 --> 00:10:58,598 I was 16 years old and very fond of my father. 140 00:10:58,680 --> 00:11:01,319 I used to race to the hospital every day after school... 141 00:11:01,880 --> 00:11:03,871 and sit in his room doing my homework. 142 00:11:04,360 --> 00:11:06,191 He was very heavily sedated. 143 00:11:06,720 --> 00:11:08,438 The last few weeks he was in coma. 144 00:11:12,440 --> 00:11:14,476 One day I thought I heard him say something. 145 00:11:15,960 --> 00:11:17,473 I got up and leaned over him... 146 00:11:18,120 --> 00:11:20,156 my ear an inch away from his lips. 147 00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:23,032 "Did you say something, Pop?" 148 00:11:25,880 --> 00:11:29,555 Then I heard the word he was desperately trying to say, a soft hiss of a word. 149 00:11:29,640 --> 00:11:30,868 He was saying: 150 00:11:34,080 --> 00:11:35,115 "Terrible." 151 00:11:43,680 --> 00:11:44,795 "Terrible." 152 00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:51,269 So the end was terrible, even for the good people like my father. 153 00:11:51,360 --> 00:11:54,238 So the purpose of all our suffering was just more suffering. 154 00:11:56,960 --> 00:12:00,919 By dinnertime, I had dispensed with God altogether. I never saw another vision. 155 00:12:05,320 --> 00:12:07,675 I haven't told anybody about this in 10 years. 156 00:12:10,840 --> 00:12:13,308 I'm telling you now because I want you to know... 157 00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:16,472 what sort of a nut you might be getting mixed up with. 158 00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:19,953 Arthur was right. 159 00:12:20,920 --> 00:12:22,717 You are a fascinating bastard. 160 00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:48,069 -Hi. -Hi. 161 00:14:48,160 --> 00:14:49,388 Well, it's settled. 162 00:14:49,480 --> 00:14:52,677 Metcalfe spoke to Spencer again this morning and it's definite. The job's mine. 163 00:14:52,760 --> 00:14:55,797 So, I'll be in Nairobi doing my post-doc work July and August... 164 00:14:55,880 --> 00:14:57,950 and in September, I'll be teaching at Harvard. 165 00:14:58,040 --> 00:14:59,075 Terrific. 166 00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:03,074 So looks like we'll both be teaching at Harvard in September. 167 00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:04,559 Looks that way. 168 00:15:06,560 --> 00:15:09,120 Well, you can't get any tidier than that, can you? 169 00:15:11,960 --> 00:15:15,555 We're going to be together in Boston, and I think we should get married. 170 00:15:17,760 --> 00:15:20,558 You know, of course, I'm supposed to be at least a little bit nuts. 171 00:15:20,640 --> 00:15:21,755 A little bit? 172 00:15:21,840 --> 00:15:23,637 You're an unmitigated madman! 173 00:15:25,440 --> 00:15:29,228 You don't have to tell me how weird you are. I know how weird you are. 174 00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:31,712 I'm the girl in your bed the past two months. 175 00:15:31,800 --> 00:15:34,553 Even sex is a mystical experience for you. 176 00:15:35,160 --> 00:15:37,628 You carry on like a flagellant, which can be very nice... 177 00:15:37,720 --> 00:15:40,280 but I sometimes wonder if it's me that's being made love to. 178 00:15:40,360 --> 00:15:44,069 I feel like I'm being harpooned by some raging monk in the act of receiving God. 179 00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:49,516 And you are a Faust-freak, Eddie. 180 00:15:50,320 --> 00:15:52,959 You'd sell your soul to find the great truth. 181 00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:56,638 Well, human life doesn't have great truths. 182 00:15:57,120 --> 00:16:00,590 We're born in doubt. We spend our lives persuading ourselves we're alive. 183 00:16:00,680 --> 00:16:03,672 And one way we do that is we love each other, like I love you. 184 00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:05,911 I can't imagine living without you. 185 00:16:07,120 --> 00:16:08,439 So, let's get married... 186 00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:11,069 and if it turns out to be a disaster, it'll be a disaster. 187 00:16:11,160 --> 00:16:12,832 We'll shake hands and say good-bye. 188 00:16:20,120 --> 00:16:21,678 He's giving her dimethyltryptamine. 189 00:16:21,760 --> 00:16:25,389 It takes effect in about a minute and she'll trip out for about half an hour. 190 00:16:31,680 --> 00:16:33,079 Do you feel different now? 191 00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:35,115 Yes. 192 00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:36,269 Less anxious? 193 00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:38,315 Much less. 194 00:16:38,520 --> 00:16:40,192 Do you have any special feelings? 195 00:16:40,560 --> 00:16:41,595 I feel... 196 00:16:42,440 --> 00:16:45,159 like my heart is being touched by Christ. 197 00:17:00,480 --> 00:17:03,916 There's a lot of religious delusion among acute schizophrenics. 198 00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:07,037 Some guys say schizophrenics are physically different from the rest of us. 199 00:17:07,120 --> 00:17:10,112 It's almost as if they were trying to change their physical selves to... 200 00:17:10,440 --> 00:17:12,954 adapt to their schizophrenic image of themselves. 201 00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:23,838 All right, we'll get married, since it's that important to you. 202 00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:26,439 I'm not comfortable with women... 203 00:17:26,560 --> 00:17:29,597 and I'm not likely to find anyone half as remarkable as you again. 204 00:17:31,120 --> 00:17:33,350 I think I can make a reasonably good husband. 205 00:17:35,720 --> 00:17:37,438 I don't want to lose you, you see. 206 00:17:39,440 --> 00:17:42,000 I suppose that's the closest thing to a declaration of love... 207 00:17:42,080 --> 00:17:43,638 that I will ever get out of you. 208 00:17:55,320 --> 00:17:56,992 Am I really that weird in bed? 209 00:17:57,680 --> 00:17:58,749 Sometimes. 210 00:18:00,920 --> 00:18:02,273 Shall I try to change? 211 00:18:02,760 --> 00:18:04,273 No, I kind of like it. 212 00:18:27,560 --> 00:18:29,949 -Daddy, I'm tired. -Here, we'll give the little lady a ride! 213 00:18:30,040 --> 00:18:31,314 Hey, Mason, be careful. 214 00:18:32,560 --> 00:18:33,675 How you doing, Eddie? 215 00:18:33,760 --> 00:18:35,318 Hi, Mason. How about a beer? 216 00:18:41,080 --> 00:18:44,595 -If I didn't see this, I wouldn't believe it! -You were supposed to come next week! 217 00:18:44,680 --> 00:18:47,513 Hi, what's your name? My name's Mason Parrish. This is Margaret. 218 00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:50,554 This is Mason. Mason, Mr. Rosenberg I'm always telling you about. 219 00:18:50,640 --> 00:18:53,108 -How are you? -Mason Parrish, nice to meet you. 220 00:18:56,520 --> 00:19:00,035 Look at the family man! Oh, why, Eddie, you look so wonderful! 221 00:19:00,120 --> 00:19:01,155 I don't believe it. 222 00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:02,912 Not again? When did this happen? 223 00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:04,035 Well, it's a long story. 224 00:19:04,120 --> 00:19:06,190 You look wonderful. Have you found a place yet? 225 00:19:06,280 --> 00:19:09,113 Yep. We got a nice little place near Huntington Field. 226 00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:11,714 My God, it's been seven years since we moved to San Francisco. 227 00:19:11,800 --> 00:19:13,119 Arthur's going to teach at Boston U! 228 00:19:13,200 --> 00:19:14,997 -Eddie's been telling me. -It's been seven years! 229 00:19:15,080 --> 00:19:16,718 I hear you just got associate professor. 230 00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:19,109 Boy, you guys must be loaded! Two professors in one family.... 231 00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:21,634 Listen, we've got a place in Maine you can use for the summer. 232 00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:24,075 I'm going to Africa again in June. Eddie will be in Mexico. 233 00:19:24,160 --> 00:19:26,469 Do you know a guy named Eccheverria, University of Mexico? 234 00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:27,834 Says he worked with you in California. 235 00:19:27,920 --> 00:19:29,273 Sure. A very bright young guy. 236 00:19:29,360 --> 00:19:32,033 He's here at the Botanical Museum. We'll all have to get together. 237 00:19:32,120 --> 00:19:34,270 I'm going back to Mexico with him in June. 238 00:19:34,560 --> 00:19:35,595 What's in Mexico? 239 00:19:35,680 --> 00:19:38,877 Eccheverria's got this witch doctor down there, the Hinchi Indians. 240 00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:41,594 They're an isolated tribe in Central Mexico who still practice... 241 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:43,910 the ancient Toltec rituals, sacred mushroom ceremonies... 242 00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:45,228 that kind of thing. 243 00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:47,788 Apparently they use some kind of hallucinatory drug... 244 00:19:47,880 --> 00:19:51,111 that is supposed to evoke a common experience in all users. 245 00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:54,159 Maggie's fallen asleep on the couch. Will you take care of her? 246 00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:55,469 Sure. 247 00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:58,349 Did you ever get into an isolation tank since New York? 248 00:19:58,440 --> 00:19:59,759 No. Did you? 249 00:19:59,840 --> 00:20:02,593 No, but I've just found out there's one here at the medical school. 250 00:20:02,680 --> 00:20:05,194 I didn't think anybody was doing those kind of studies anymore. 251 00:20:05,280 --> 00:20:07,953 I thought we did some interesting stuff in that tank in New York... 252 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:09,837 for the couple of months we played around with it. 253 00:20:09,920 --> 00:20:12,115 Maybe when I get back from Mexico we'll get into it again. 254 00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:13,349 Okay, why not? 255 00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:24,038 A terrific housekeeper she's not. 256 00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:28,271 -They're getting a divorce, you know. -Who? 257 00:20:28,360 --> 00:20:31,352 -I don't know if they're actually getting-- -What are you talking about? 258 00:20:31,440 --> 00:20:33,510 She and the kids are moving to a place in Cambridge. 259 00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:34,919 That's why this place is such a mess. 260 00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,309 They're moving her stuff into storage tomorrow. 261 00:20:40,600 --> 00:20:43,160 Then she's going off to Africa for a year with the kids... 262 00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:44,992 and he's going to Mexico. 263 00:20:45,080 --> 00:20:48,390 And when she comes back, she's going to live in Cambridge and he's staying here. 264 00:20:48,480 --> 00:20:49,993 It's him who wants the divorce, not her. 265 00:20:50,080 --> 00:20:52,310 Listen, I'm surprised they stayed together this long. 266 00:20:52,640 --> 00:20:53,993 When did all this happen? 267 00:20:54,080 --> 00:20:55,911 She just told me five minutes ago. 268 00:20:56,240 --> 00:20:59,471 What about all those letters she kept writing us about how happy they were? 269 00:20:59,560 --> 00:21:02,870 Don't ask me. She's still crazy about him. He's still crazy. 270 00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:12,998 Listen, Sylvia just-- 271 00:21:13,800 --> 00:21:16,234 Sylvia just told me you're getting a divorce. 272 00:21:17,600 --> 00:21:18,953 No, we're getting separated. 273 00:21:19,040 --> 00:21:21,838 Anyway, we probably won't get around to the divorce till next year. 274 00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:24,760 I mean, I know it's none of my business, but why? 275 00:21:25,760 --> 00:21:28,149 You are married to a great woman who adores you. 276 00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:30,390 My God, if anybody has it made, you have. 277 00:21:31,320 --> 00:21:33,311 You are a respected and an admired figure... 278 00:21:33,400 --> 00:21:36,472 a full professor on the faculty of the Harvard Medical School. 279 00:21:36,680 --> 00:21:41,151 For God's sake, is that how you imagine me? A respected and admired figure? 280 00:21:41,960 --> 00:21:43,678 A devoted father? A loving husband? 281 00:21:43,760 --> 00:21:47,150 Well, I've also published nearly two papers a year for the last seven years... 282 00:21:47,240 --> 00:21:49,310 and not a fundamental piece of work in the lot. 283 00:21:49,920 --> 00:21:53,799 I sit around the living rooms of other young married faculty members... 284 00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:55,472 talking infantile masturbation: 285 00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:57,198 "Who's sucking up to the head of the department?" 286 00:21:57,280 --> 00:21:59,510 "Whose tenure is hanging by a thread?" 287 00:22:00,680 --> 00:22:02,591 Emily is quite content to go on with this life. 288 00:22:02,680 --> 00:22:05,069 She insists she's in love with me, whatever that is. 289 00:22:05,160 --> 00:22:07,720 What she means is she prefers the senseless pain... 290 00:22:07,800 --> 00:22:09,279 we inflict on each other to the pain... 291 00:22:09,360 --> 00:22:11,476 we would otherwise inflict on ourselves. 292 00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:14,630 But I'm not afraid of that solitary pain. 293 00:22:16,240 --> 00:22:18,435 In fact, if I don't strip myself of all this clatter... 294 00:22:18,520 --> 00:22:20,431 and clutter and ridiculous ritual... 295 00:22:20,520 --> 00:22:22,590 I shall go out of my fucking mind! 296 00:22:24,200 --> 00:22:25,713 Does that answer your question, Arthur? 297 00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:27,153 What question was that? 298 00:22:27,280 --> 00:22:29,077 You asked me why I was getting divorced. 299 00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:30,798 Listen, it's your life. 300 00:22:31,280 --> 00:22:32,554 I'm sorry I even asked. 301 00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:34,035 Listen... 302 00:22:34,880 --> 00:22:38,316 why don't I call Eccheverria and we'll all go out and have some dinner? 303 00:22:40,680 --> 00:22:43,638 As a matter of fact, Eduardo, my year in India was disappointing. 304 00:22:43,720 --> 00:22:45,233 No matter how you slice it, yoga is still... 305 00:22:45,320 --> 00:22:47,595 a state-specific technology operating in the service of... 306 00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:48,999 an a priori belief system on which-- 307 00:22:49,080 --> 00:22:53,153 We scientists have a moral obligation to the public as well as to our own research. 308 00:22:53,240 --> 00:22:54,434 It just never occurred to baboons... 309 00:22:54,520 --> 00:22:57,796 that they could shorten that time to five minutes if they used a stick. 310 00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:03,276 Originally, man was just another savanna-living primate like the baboon. 311 00:23:03,360 --> 00:23:05,271 What dignifies the yogic practices... 312 00:23:05,360 --> 00:23:07,828 is that the belief system itself is not truly religious. 313 00:23:09,880 --> 00:23:11,791 There is no Buddhist God, per se. 314 00:23:11,880 --> 00:23:16,476 It is the self, the individual mind, that contains immortality and ultimate truth. 315 00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:18,352 What the hell is not religious about that? 316 00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:20,510 You've simply replaced God with the original self. 317 00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:21,635 Yes, but we've localized it. 318 00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:23,915 At least we know where the self is, it's in our own minds. 319 00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:27,151 It's a form of human energy. Our atoms are six billion years old. 320 00:23:27,240 --> 00:23:30,437 We've got six billion years of memory in our minds. 321 00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:33,360 Memory is energy! It doesn't disappear! It's still in there! 322 00:23:33,440 --> 00:23:36,432 There's a physiological pathway to our earlier consciousnesses. 323 00:23:36,520 --> 00:23:39,432 There has to be! I'm telling you, it's in the goddamned limbic system. 324 00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:40,999 Jessup, you are a wacko! 325 00:23:41,080 --> 00:23:43,878 What's wacko about it, Mason? I'm a man in search of his true self. 326 00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:46,599 How archetypically American can you get? 327 00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:48,836 Everybody's looking for their true selves. 328 00:23:48,920 --> 00:23:51,434 We're all trying to fulfill ourselves... 329 00:23:51,800 --> 00:23:54,155 understand ourselves, get in touch with ourselves... 330 00:23:54,240 --> 00:23:58,358 face the reality of ourselves, explore ourselves, expand ourselves. 331 00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:00,079 Ever since we dispensed with God... 332 00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:04,199 we've got nothing but ourselves to explain this meaningless horror of life. 333 00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:05,474 You're a wacko. 334 00:24:07,480 --> 00:24:09,596 Well, I think that, that true self... 335 00:24:10,280 --> 00:24:14,910 that original self, that first self, is a real, mensurate, quantifiable thing... 336 00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:17,673 tangible and incarnate... 337 00:24:18,840 --> 00:24:20,717 and I'm going to find the fucker. 338 00:24:44,080 --> 00:24:45,877 What are their chemical properties? 339 00:24:47,640 --> 00:24:48,755 Are they safe? 340 00:24:48,840 --> 00:24:52,230 The mushrooms are almost certainly Amanita muscaria... 341 00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:55,870 a very powerful psychedelic, and a little dangerous. 342 00:24:56,520 --> 00:24:59,830 It contains belladonna-like alkaloids... 343 00:25:00,040 --> 00:25:02,031 atropine, scopolamine. 344 00:25:02,600 --> 00:25:05,956 The sinicuiche plant is highly regarded... 345 00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:08,117 among a number of Indian tribes. 346 00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:10,111 I've seen it as far north as Chihuahua. 347 00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:13,238 The Indians say it evokes old memories... 348 00:25:13,720 --> 00:25:15,039 even ancient ones... 349 00:25:16,360 --> 00:25:19,591 and the Hinchis call it "the first flower." 350 00:25:21,240 --> 00:25:23,196 The "first" in the sense of primordial? 351 00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:24,435 Yes. 352 00:25:24,760 --> 00:25:26,637 In the sense of the most ancient. 353 00:25:27,600 --> 00:25:28,874 I'd like to try it. 354 00:25:30,680 --> 00:25:33,240 Do you think they'd let me join their ritual? 355 00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:36,550 Well, they seem like agreeable people. 356 00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:56,959 He says it's all right for you to participate in their ceremony. 357 00:25:57,040 --> 00:25:59,873 Good. Ask him what kind of an experience I can expect. 358 00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:02,956 Are they gathering these mushrooms for the ritual? 359 00:26:03,040 --> 00:26:05,156 No, they're being harvested for next year. Brujo! 360 00:26:16,560 --> 00:26:19,074 Your soul will return to the first soul. 361 00:26:20,080 --> 00:26:21,957 Ask him what this first soul will look like. 362 00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:29,319 It is unborn stuff. 363 00:26:35,640 --> 00:26:38,029 Then you will propel into the void. 364 00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:42,033 You will see a spot. 365 00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:47,951 The spot will become a crack. 366 00:26:50,480 --> 00:26:52,789 This is the crack between the nothing... 367 00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:59,632 and out of this nothing will come your unborn soul. 368 00:28:13,720 --> 00:28:17,269 He wants you to hold the root. Put out your hand with the palm up. 369 00:28:36,920 --> 00:28:37,989 Eduardo! 370 00:29:24,080 --> 00:29:25,911 -Jesus Christ. -Are you all right? 371 00:35:28,280 --> 00:35:30,111 We only have their word I killed a lizard. 372 00:35:30,880 --> 00:35:33,519 You didn't see it and I have no recollection of it! 373 00:35:33,680 --> 00:35:35,557 And this whole hideous business is just a joke... 374 00:35:35,640 --> 00:35:38,552 the Indians have played on me to make the gringo look like a fool! 375 00:35:38,640 --> 00:35:41,518 Look, you asked me what happened and I told you! 376 00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:44,036 You drank the mixture and you went outside. 377 00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:47,240 After a while there was a scream and some dogs were barking. 378 00:35:47,320 --> 00:35:48,594 I started after you. 379 00:35:48,760 --> 00:35:50,637 The screaming stopped and the brujo yelled at me... 380 00:35:50,720 --> 00:35:51,789 to come back and forget it. 381 00:35:51,880 --> 00:35:52,915 Oh, bullshit! 382 00:35:53,400 --> 00:35:54,435 Then why did you ask the brujo... 383 00:35:54,520 --> 00:35:56,317 to give you the mixture to take back to Boston? 384 00:35:56,800 --> 00:35:59,268 I thought I'd like Arthur to analyze, maybe synthesize, it. 385 00:36:02,760 --> 00:36:04,398 The noise is stupefying. 386 00:36:25,080 --> 00:36:27,275 The sun became black... 387 00:36:28,440 --> 00:36:29,714 as sackcloth. 388 00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:37,392 The full moon became like blood. 389 00:36:39,800 --> 00:36:42,234 Then a great mountain burning with fire... 390 00:36:45,840 --> 00:36:47,558 was thrown into the sea. 391 00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:57,993 And the beast ascends from the bottomless pit. 392 00:36:58,080 --> 00:37:01,629 The angel of the bottomless pit. His name is... 393 00:37:08,840 --> 00:37:10,034 Abaddon. 394 00:37:11,320 --> 00:37:12,469 He is off the wall. 395 00:37:12,560 --> 00:37:13,549 Are you okay? 396 00:37:13,640 --> 00:37:15,596 Get this stuff! It's new! 397 00:37:15,920 --> 00:37:18,195 It's deafening! The noise is deafening! 398 00:37:19,640 --> 00:37:21,358 Can you hear me above this noise? 399 00:37:22,120 --> 00:37:23,155 Oh, my God. 400 00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:24,959 The most unbelievable thing I've seen! 401 00:37:25,040 --> 00:37:27,156 I'm watching the birth agony of a mountain! 402 00:37:29,240 --> 00:37:30,309 Oh, my God. 403 00:37:30,440 --> 00:37:31,714 Are you okay? 404 00:37:33,160 --> 00:37:36,357 I'm fine. Really, I'm fine. 405 00:37:36,440 --> 00:37:38,237 Do you want me to bring you down now? 406 00:37:41,680 --> 00:37:42,715 What happens now? 407 00:37:42,800 --> 00:37:45,951 He's blacked-out. His blackouts can get pretty freaky. 408 00:37:46,040 --> 00:37:47,598 Sometimes they last as long as four hours. 409 00:37:47,680 --> 00:37:49,671 When he comes out of it, he's as chipper as a bird... 410 00:37:49,760 --> 00:37:51,113 but he doesn't remember a thing. 411 00:37:51,280 --> 00:37:54,113 Just how dangerous is this stuff he brought back from Mexico? 412 00:37:54,200 --> 00:37:56,111 No, I didn't say dangerous, just said it was weird. 413 00:37:56,200 --> 00:37:57,235 It hangs around too long... 414 00:37:57,320 --> 00:38:00,312 and what's really screwy is it heads straight to the brain. 415 00:38:00,920 --> 00:38:02,399 Well, I don't believe this. 416 00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:06,396 You guys are shooting up with an untested drug that stacks up in the brain... 417 00:38:06,480 --> 00:38:09,517 and works in the nucleus of the cell, and you don't call that dangerous? 418 00:38:09,600 --> 00:38:12,398 For the record, we don't actually shoot up. 419 00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:14,997 -Eddie drinks a 10-milligram-- -It will stop now! 420 00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:17,116 You guys are supposed to be reputable scientists... 421 00:38:17,200 --> 00:38:20,272 not two kids in the dorm freaking out on Mexican mushrooms! 422 00:38:21,680 --> 00:38:24,069 Well, why do you think I called you for? Let's see you stop him. 423 00:38:31,320 --> 00:38:32,958 This ain't LSD, goddamn it. 424 00:38:33,040 --> 00:38:35,315 This ain't no serotonin antagonist you're drinking! 425 00:38:35,760 --> 00:38:38,399 How many grams of that stuff do you think you've already got in you? 426 00:38:38,480 --> 00:38:39,959 Two? Three? 427 00:38:40,760 --> 00:38:43,115 You could be working up one hell of a case of cancer... 428 00:38:43,200 --> 00:38:44,872 with the truckload of antimetabolites in you. 429 00:38:44,960 --> 00:38:48,396 The Hinchi Indians have done it for centuries with no incidence of cancer. 430 00:38:48,480 --> 00:38:49,674 Fuck the Hinchi Indians! 431 00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:51,512 You don't know anything about those mushrooms! 432 00:38:51,600 --> 00:38:53,511 They seem to have fantastic staying power! 433 00:38:53,600 --> 00:38:55,272 We've shot up at least 30 rats with that stuff. 434 00:38:55,360 --> 00:38:57,078 Some of them have a whopping load in them... 435 00:38:57,160 --> 00:38:59,390 and none of them have been noticeably affected. 436 00:38:59,480 --> 00:39:02,392 Where are we going now? I thought we were going to get something to eat. 437 00:39:02,480 --> 00:39:03,993 Eddie wants to show me an isolation tank. 438 00:39:04,080 --> 00:39:07,277 Isolation tank! You guys get flakier every time I talk to you! 439 00:39:07,360 --> 00:39:09,999 I thought all that isolation tank stuff went out in the '60s... 440 00:39:10,080 --> 00:39:12,275 with Timothy Leary and all them other gurus! 441 00:39:12,360 --> 00:39:15,079 Will you shut up for a minute and let somebody else say something? 442 00:39:15,160 --> 00:39:16,957 What happens during these blackout periods is... 443 00:39:17,040 --> 00:39:19,156 you get the feeling of phenomenal acceleration... 444 00:39:19,240 --> 00:39:22,118 like you're being shot out over millions, billions of years. 445 00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:23,713 Time simply obliterates. 446 00:39:24,000 --> 00:39:26,878 You sense the hallucination is going on, but you get no images. 447 00:39:26,960 --> 00:39:28,678 I want to break through that blackout barrier. 448 00:39:28,760 --> 00:39:32,196 I want to know what those images are that I know are going on but I can't see. 449 00:39:32,320 --> 00:39:35,756 We can't raise the dosage of the drug because we're close to toxic levels now. 450 00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:37,910 The only way to intensify the experience is... 451 00:39:38,000 --> 00:39:39,638 to take the 200 milligrams along with the tank. 452 00:39:39,720 --> 00:39:42,359 There's more I'd like to do to that drug before you take it again. 453 00:39:42,440 --> 00:39:43,793 I'd like to do a half-life determination. 454 00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:46,394 -That would take us a year! -I'd like to know the transport system. 455 00:39:46,480 --> 00:39:47,469 I'd like to find some analogues. 456 00:39:47,560 --> 00:39:50,074 All I know is this Mexican stuff is an extraordinary substance... 457 00:39:50,160 --> 00:39:53,038 and every instinct I have tells me I'm onto something hot here... 458 00:39:53,120 --> 00:39:55,998 and another 200 milligrams isn't going to kill anybody. 459 00:39:58,200 --> 00:39:59,269 There it is. 460 00:40:03,160 --> 00:40:04,309 Oh, it's horizontal. 461 00:40:06,200 --> 00:40:08,236 It's smaller than the one we had in New York. 462 00:40:09,680 --> 00:40:11,432 If they're doing sleep studies here, it must be-- 463 00:40:11,520 --> 00:40:12,999 I don't think anybody's used it in years... 464 00:40:13,080 --> 00:40:14,672 but I checked it out yesterday and it works. 465 00:40:14,760 --> 00:40:16,239 It won't take a week to clean this place. 466 00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:17,389 Get your ass in a sling... 467 00:40:17,480 --> 00:40:20,313 if it ever gets out you're using an untested drug on human subjects. 468 00:40:20,400 --> 00:40:22,152 Don't worry. Nothing's going to happen to me. 469 00:40:22,240 --> 00:40:23,389 Let's go get a quick hamburger. 470 00:40:23,480 --> 00:40:25,311 I'm seeing one of my students tonight. 471 00:40:25,400 --> 00:40:26,435 All right! 472 00:40:26,880 --> 00:40:30,190 Do what you want to do. I think you're both irresponsible as hell. 473 00:40:30,560 --> 00:40:34,348 Don't call me and tell me you're worried about Eddie putting all this shit into him! 474 00:40:34,440 --> 00:40:37,512 I'm telling you right now, don't you put any more of that shit into him... 475 00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:39,318 until you know a hell of a lot more about it! 476 00:40:39,400 --> 00:40:42,278 I've offered you the use of my lab and all the rats you can cut! 477 00:40:42,360 --> 00:40:45,079 That's as much as I want to be implicated in your dumb experiments! 478 00:40:45,160 --> 00:40:46,639 Go get your own dumb hamburger. 479 00:40:46,720 --> 00:40:48,995 I've already got my own date I'm an hour late for! 480 00:41:00,560 --> 00:41:03,074 I already did these first three. You do the rest. 481 00:41:11,840 --> 00:41:13,319 Well, well, well. 482 00:41:13,880 --> 00:41:15,233 Couldn't resist, right? 483 00:41:15,600 --> 00:41:18,433 Well, somebody's gotta keep on eye on you two sorcerers. 484 00:41:19,440 --> 00:41:21,556 What have you got in there, some kind of salt solution? 485 00:41:21,640 --> 00:41:24,871 Ten percent magnesium sulfate, for buoyancy. 486 00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:30,199 -Weird, man. -Excuse me, Mason. 487 00:41:36,400 --> 00:41:37,799 One, two, three, four. 488 00:41:38,120 --> 00:41:39,473 One, two, three, four. 489 00:41:39,560 --> 00:41:40,879 Okay, you're fine. 490 00:41:41,680 --> 00:41:45,036 Wednesday, January 7, 4:28 p.m. 491 00:41:46,200 --> 00:41:47,599 Hey, this is terrific! 492 00:41:49,200 --> 00:41:50,235 I'm on a plateau.... 493 00:41:50,320 --> 00:41:52,834 He went into beta like a shot. No spindling, nothing. 494 00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:55,598 Grasslands, savannas. 495 00:41:57,480 --> 00:41:58,833 I feel... 496 00:41:59,400 --> 00:42:02,437 I am actually alive and inside this landscape. 497 00:42:04,080 --> 00:42:06,150 A density of woodlands about a mile away. 498 00:42:06,240 --> 00:42:09,118 Beyond that, mountains that seem to be smoking. 499 00:42:09,200 --> 00:42:12,431 Newly born mountains, Cenozoic, latter Tertiary. 500 00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:15,958 I'm in an edge-area. 501 00:42:16,240 --> 00:42:18,515 Utter tranquility, but alive. 502 00:42:18,600 --> 00:42:20,989 Life in the trees. Life in the sedge. 503 00:42:22,000 --> 00:42:23,115 Oh, my God... 504 00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:26,351 the birth of man. That's got to be it! 505 00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:29,315 My God! There it is... 506 00:42:30,720 --> 00:42:31,994 a protohuman. 507 00:42:32,080 --> 00:42:35,277 The first, and the original, truly human form... 508 00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:39,512 tiny, perhaps four feet high, completely furred... 509 00:42:40,160 --> 00:42:41,912 chimp-like, but erect. 510 00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:43,558 No knuckle-walking. Shorter arms. 511 00:42:43,640 --> 00:42:45,756 He's moving along so gracefully. 512 00:42:45,840 --> 00:42:47,956 There's two, three of them. 513 00:42:49,560 --> 00:42:53,155 Bipedal, tiny, little furred humanoid creatures... 514 00:42:53,240 --> 00:42:55,470 got a chunk of lava in their hands, they're... 515 00:42:57,000 --> 00:42:58,991 stalking or hunting something. 516 00:43:00,480 --> 00:43:02,277 For Christ's sake. 517 00:43:03,800 --> 00:43:05,153 Are you okay, Eddie? 518 00:43:05,240 --> 00:43:08,277 I'm becoming one of them. I'm no longer observing. 519 00:43:09,720 --> 00:43:10,835 I'm one of them. 520 00:43:15,080 --> 00:43:17,833 Killing, I'm killing a goat. 521 00:43:18,160 --> 00:43:19,479 I'm killing.... 522 00:43:20,080 --> 00:43:21,195 I'm eating.... 523 00:43:21,440 --> 00:43:24,876 I'm eating the blood, hot flesh of a goat. 524 00:43:30,840 --> 00:43:31,909 Are you okay? 525 00:43:33,320 --> 00:43:34,355 Beautiful. 526 00:43:35,760 --> 00:43:37,796 -Do you want to come down? -No! 527 00:43:51,200 --> 00:43:53,395 It sounded like he was having a bad trip to me. 528 00:43:53,480 --> 00:43:55,948 Some of these tank trips can get pretty creepy. 529 00:43:58,640 --> 00:44:00,073 What the hell was that? 530 00:44:04,040 --> 00:44:05,109 Are you okay? 531 00:44:05,960 --> 00:44:06,995 Beautiful. 532 00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:09,391 -Do you want to stop this? -No. 533 00:44:09,480 --> 00:44:12,233 -Do you want me to leave you alone? -Yeah. 534 00:44:28,520 --> 00:44:31,432 I thought you said these things don't last more than four hours. 535 00:44:31,520 --> 00:44:32,589 It's quarter to 9:00. 536 00:44:32,680 --> 00:44:33,749 He's coming out. 537 00:44:36,200 --> 00:44:39,795 I don't like being out of contact for these long periods of time. 538 00:44:50,320 --> 00:44:51,435 I think he's in shock. 539 00:44:51,520 --> 00:44:53,715 He must have had a seizure, hit his head or something. 540 00:45:38,480 --> 00:45:39,959 Now, hold on. 541 00:45:53,640 --> 00:45:55,358 What do you want blood tests for? 542 00:45:56,720 --> 00:45:57,755 What's he say? 543 00:45:57,840 --> 00:45:59,796 "Buccal smear, blood for a karyotype... 544 00:45:59,880 --> 00:46:02,030 "also pictures for the Goodman and Sarich's lab. 545 00:46:02,120 --> 00:46:04,554 "Pictures of my neck, now, before I... 546 00:46:05,200 --> 00:46:06,235 "reconstitute." 547 00:46:06,320 --> 00:46:07,355 Before he what? 548 00:46:08,160 --> 00:46:09,752 Before he reconstitutes. 549 00:46:09,960 --> 00:46:12,872 Then take his damn blood, and maybe he'll let me have a look at him. 550 00:46:16,920 --> 00:46:19,229 Do you mind if I examine your neck for a minute? 551 00:46:20,680 --> 00:46:22,238 -Any masses? -No. 552 00:46:27,800 --> 00:46:29,199 Stop talking shit! 553 00:46:29,280 --> 00:46:31,748 Are you trying to say your dumb hallucination has externalized? 554 00:46:31,840 --> 00:46:32,875 What did he write? 555 00:46:33,000 --> 00:46:34,831 "Not common aphasia. 556 00:46:34,920 --> 00:46:38,117 "Time-space fallout from the hallucination." 557 00:46:38,200 --> 00:46:40,350 You are a fucking flake, Jessup. 558 00:46:40,440 --> 00:46:42,510 So get dressed. I'm gonna take you over to the Brigham... 559 00:46:42,600 --> 00:46:44,158 and do a complete workup on you. 560 00:46:46,160 --> 00:46:48,799 You are a very sick dude, you dumb son of a bitch. 561 00:46:48,880 --> 00:46:50,791 I'll look down your throat, do some skull films... 562 00:46:50,880 --> 00:46:52,950 get a CAT scan, maybe even an arteriogram... 563 00:46:53,040 --> 00:46:56,316 and I'd like an unbiased eye to look at those EEG tracings. 564 00:46:57,520 --> 00:46:58,794 What's he say? 565 00:46:59,120 --> 00:47:00,394 "X-ray." 566 00:47:00,560 --> 00:47:03,677 All right, finish up with him, Arthur, and let's get him over to x-ray. 567 00:47:04,240 --> 00:47:05,559 Be right back. 568 00:47:33,280 --> 00:47:34,952 Is it possible it's purely mechanical? 569 00:47:35,040 --> 00:47:37,600 Well, if it isn't neurological, it's got to be mechanical. 570 00:47:38,080 --> 00:47:42,198 I'd like some plain films of this guy's neck. A PA, a lateral and oblique. 571 00:47:42,280 --> 00:47:43,918 Jesus, Doctor, I'm backed up to my ass! 572 00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:46,195 Just take the damn pictures! This is an emergency! 573 00:47:46,280 --> 00:47:47,315 Okay. 574 00:48:04,600 --> 00:48:05,953 Might be a TIΑ. 575 00:48:06,840 --> 00:48:09,035 I guess we'd better not tell Eddie he had... 576 00:48:09,400 --> 00:48:13,109 blood all over his face when he came out of the tank. He'll claim it was... 577 00:48:14,200 --> 00:48:17,078 goat's blood from that goat he was eating in his hallucination. 578 00:48:17,160 --> 00:48:19,594 You know, you're really getting as weird as he is! 579 00:48:19,680 --> 00:48:21,432 Well, what do you think happened? 580 00:48:22,120 --> 00:48:24,236 He's not the type for hysterical conversion... 581 00:48:24,320 --> 00:48:25,435 so I'm thinking seizure. 582 00:48:25,520 --> 00:48:29,229 He came out of that tank in a fugue state and had blood all over his face. 583 00:48:29,320 --> 00:48:31,231 He must have had a seizure while in the tank... 584 00:48:31,320 --> 00:48:34,596 bit his lip while convulsing, and is postictally aphasic. 585 00:48:34,680 --> 00:48:38,468 I thought maybe he had a vascular insult, a stroke, a flipped embolus... 586 00:48:39,320 --> 00:48:42,392 but neurologically he's intact, so I'm thinking seizure now. 587 00:48:54,360 --> 00:48:56,749 Now you just take it easy. 588 00:48:56,840 --> 00:48:59,274 None of us are so terrific at reading x-rays. 589 00:48:59,560 --> 00:49:00,913 What are you guys looking for? 590 00:49:01,000 --> 00:49:03,753 Just put these in an envelope. Who's reading tonight in radiology? 591 00:49:03,840 --> 00:49:05,159 Dr. Wissenschaft. 592 00:49:07,600 --> 00:49:09,477 I want someone reliable to look at them. 593 00:49:09,560 --> 00:49:11,676 I'd rather not have everyone in the Brigham in on this. 594 00:49:11,760 --> 00:49:13,876 It's bad enough we've got this nosy x-ray technician. 595 00:49:13,960 --> 00:49:15,075 Are you all right? 596 00:49:15,160 --> 00:49:18,118 I'm fine, Mason. I tried to indicate this was just a transient thing. 597 00:49:18,200 --> 00:49:20,668 A transient ischemic attack, that's what it was. 598 00:49:20,760 --> 00:49:23,274 -He's got his voice back. -It wasn't an ischemic attack! 599 00:49:23,680 --> 00:49:25,671 It wasn't a seizure. You saw the x-rays, Mason. 600 00:49:25,760 --> 00:49:28,911 There was something anterior to the larynx that looked like a laryngeal sac. 601 00:49:29,000 --> 00:49:31,355 That's strictly simian. I obviously regressed... 602 00:49:31,680 --> 00:49:34,035 to some quasi-simian creature. 603 00:49:39,400 --> 00:49:41,391 I'll show these to someone who can read them right. 604 00:49:41,480 --> 00:49:43,277 'Cause you're reading them wrong. That's all. 605 00:49:43,360 --> 00:49:44,554 Because no one is going to tell me... 606 00:49:44,640 --> 00:49:47,200 you de-differentiated your goddamn genetic structure... 607 00:49:47,280 --> 00:49:50,033 for four goddamn hours and then reconstituted! 608 00:49:50,240 --> 00:49:53,073 I'm a professor of endocrinology at the Harvard Medical School! 609 00:49:53,160 --> 00:49:55,674 I'm an attending physician at the Peter Bent Brigham Hospital! 610 00:49:55,760 --> 00:49:56,875 I'm a contributing editor... 611 00:49:56,960 --> 00:49:58,951 to the American Journal of Endocrinology! 612 00:49:59,040 --> 00:50:02,828 And I'm a fellow and vice-president of the Eastern Association of Endocrinologists! 613 00:50:02,920 --> 00:50:04,797 And president of the Journal Club! 614 00:50:05,240 --> 00:50:06,878 And I'm not going to listen to any more... 615 00:50:06,960 --> 00:50:11,829 of your cabalistic, quantum, frigging, dumb, limbo mumbo jumbo! 616 00:50:11,920 --> 00:50:14,070 I'm gonna show these to a radiologist! 617 00:50:25,320 --> 00:50:26,355 Do me a favor. 618 00:50:26,440 --> 00:50:28,749 Conclusion: bilateral aspiration pneumonia. 619 00:50:28,840 --> 00:50:32,150 -Do me a favor and take a look at these. -What's the story in this case? 620 00:50:32,680 --> 00:50:37,390 A 35-year-old white man, acute onset of aphasia, no history of trauma. 621 00:50:37,960 --> 00:50:39,439 What are you looking for? 622 00:50:39,520 --> 00:50:42,478 It looks to me like the architecture is somewhat abnormal. 623 00:50:44,960 --> 00:50:46,029 Somewhat? 624 00:50:47,400 --> 00:50:49,038 This guy is a fucking gorilla! 625 00:51:55,720 --> 00:51:57,312 Are you okay, Dr. Jessup? 626 00:51:57,400 --> 00:51:58,469 Yes. 627 00:53:24,880 --> 00:53:26,598 Are you all right, Dr. Jessup? 628 00:53:33,200 --> 00:53:34,235 I'm fine. 629 00:53:43,240 --> 00:53:44,878 I just want to make a few notes. 630 00:54:16,280 --> 00:54:19,317 Mr. Daniel Craig... 631 00:54:19,400 --> 00:54:20,389 Emily! 632 00:54:20,480 --> 00:54:21,708 ...information counter, American Airlines. 633 00:54:21,800 --> 00:54:23,631 My God, you look so marvelous! 634 00:54:24,800 --> 00:54:26,153 How have you been, Eddie? 635 00:54:26,520 --> 00:54:27,748 Just fine. You? 636 00:54:28,120 --> 00:54:29,155 Fine. 637 00:54:30,160 --> 00:54:31,388 Look, there's your Daddy. 638 00:54:31,480 --> 00:54:33,232 Are you going to drive us to our new house? 639 00:54:34,000 --> 00:54:35,956 You bet your life. And depending how nice you are... 640 00:54:36,040 --> 00:54:38,190 may even take you to a Chinese restaurant. 641 00:54:40,120 --> 00:54:43,556 Anyway, don't let anybody tell you baboons aren't occasionally carnivorous. 642 00:54:43,640 --> 00:54:45,995 I observed instances of predation... 643 00:54:46,200 --> 00:54:48,873 which involved the unmistakable behavior of hunters. 644 00:54:48,960 --> 00:54:51,679 A pair of baboons killed a Thomson's gazelle and ate it. 645 00:54:51,760 --> 00:54:53,716 There was even a rudimentary communication... 646 00:54:53,800 --> 00:54:55,392 between the two baboons. 647 00:54:56,320 --> 00:54:57,469 So I've become... 648 00:54:57,600 --> 00:55:00,717 fascinated with the work being done on nonverbal communication with apes. 649 00:55:00,800 --> 00:55:03,598 I've been corresponding with the Gardners at the University of Nevada. 650 00:55:03,800 --> 00:55:06,598 I may just go out and spend a couple of weeks there this summer. 651 00:55:06,960 --> 00:55:09,269 I've got nothing else to do except write up my report. 652 00:55:09,480 --> 00:55:12,472 I don't suppose you recorded any of those baboon sounds? 653 00:55:12,960 --> 00:55:14,393 Yes, of course I did. Why? 654 00:55:14,600 --> 00:55:16,079 I'd like very much to hear them. 655 00:55:16,480 --> 00:55:17,515 Of course. 656 00:55:18,560 --> 00:55:21,120 Mrs. Tally said she'll be here tomorrow morning at 10:30... 657 00:55:21,200 --> 00:55:22,952 to help you put everything away. 658 00:55:23,440 --> 00:55:26,512 She wanted to know if you wanted her to come back to work steady. 659 00:55:26,600 --> 00:55:28,556 I got a letter from Mason about a week ago... 660 00:55:28,640 --> 00:55:30,437 just before we left Nairobi. 661 00:55:34,200 --> 00:55:37,112 He says that you've been working with a very complex drug... 662 00:55:37,200 --> 00:55:38,952 which you brought back from Mexico. 663 00:55:39,600 --> 00:55:42,592 It hasn't been thoroughly tested yet and is dangerous as hell. 664 00:55:44,480 --> 00:55:46,118 What else did Mason write you? 665 00:55:46,920 --> 00:55:50,549 That over the past year you've taken about two grams of that drug yourself... 666 00:55:51,040 --> 00:55:53,998 and that you had a very unusual instance of genetic regression... 667 00:55:54,080 --> 00:55:55,115 about three months ago. 668 00:55:55,520 --> 00:55:57,829 You may have leukemia or lymphoma. 669 00:55:59,800 --> 00:56:02,314 He's been trying to get you to go for a complete workup... 670 00:56:02,400 --> 00:56:03,719 but you've refused to go. 671 00:56:04,400 --> 00:56:06,630 He's worried stiff that you're cracking up. 672 00:56:07,120 --> 00:56:09,270 He thinks you're behaving very strangely... 673 00:56:09,840 --> 00:56:12,673 and he begged me to talk to you about this when I got back. 674 00:56:13,200 --> 00:56:17,034 Mason is pathologically incapable of keeping his mouth shut about anything. 675 00:56:17,120 --> 00:56:20,237 -He's a stupid, starched, doctrinaire idiot! -Mason is a first-rate doctor! 676 00:56:20,320 --> 00:56:21,753 It's not leukemia! 677 00:56:24,160 --> 00:56:25,878 Or any other kind of cancer! 678 00:56:26,760 --> 00:56:29,752 I've let him do a liver-spleen scan on me and a CAT scan. 679 00:56:29,840 --> 00:56:32,070 I have been probed, scoped and palpated! 680 00:56:32,160 --> 00:56:35,232 Mason's had a mirror down my throat or up my ass for the last three months... 681 00:56:35,320 --> 00:56:37,834 and there is no evidence, no suggestion whatsoever, of cancer! 682 00:56:38,200 --> 00:56:39,713 What else did Mason write you? 683 00:56:42,120 --> 00:56:44,315 Which of these has the baboon vocalizations on them? 684 00:56:44,400 --> 00:56:45,958 -I'd like to hear them. -Why? 685 00:56:46,040 --> 00:56:48,349 Did he write to you that during the regression I went through... 686 00:56:48,440 --> 00:56:50,590 I had an aphasic experience for about four hours? 687 00:56:50,680 --> 00:56:53,478 The only sounds I could get out were clicks and grunts. 688 00:56:53,560 --> 00:56:55,915 My hunch is they're like the baboon vocalizations on your tapes. 689 00:56:56,000 --> 00:56:58,195 Mason said you took blood tests and the lab report showed... 690 00:56:58,280 --> 00:57:00,191 some characteristics of simian blood group systems. 691 00:57:00,600 --> 00:57:01,999 As well as antigens specific to man. 692 00:57:02,080 --> 00:57:03,354 I'd like to see that data. 693 00:57:03,440 --> 00:57:07,115 The thing to do is for me to get back to that isolation tank and try it again! 694 00:57:07,200 --> 00:57:10,192 Let's see if it happens again! None of us really believes it happened. 695 00:57:10,280 --> 00:57:13,431 After three months, I'm beginning to wonder if it ever happened myself. 696 00:57:13,800 --> 00:57:16,678 They won't go back to the tank. Mason's taken over the whole project. 697 00:57:16,760 --> 00:57:19,513 He's got Arthur up in his lab every day fractionating rats' brains! 698 00:57:19,600 --> 00:57:22,797 What the hell am I supposed to do while they're fractionating rats' brains? 699 00:57:22,880 --> 00:57:23,915 Mommy. 700 00:57:27,760 --> 00:57:29,637 Everybody thinks your father's going nuts. 701 00:57:29,720 --> 00:57:31,915 Mommy, when are we going to eat? 702 00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:36,639 Run along now and play with Grace. 703 00:57:36,720 --> 00:57:40,315 I am convinced that the regression was triggered by an act of consciousness. 704 00:57:40,400 --> 00:57:43,472 When I was in the tank, I entered another consciousness! 705 00:57:43,560 --> 00:57:46,358 I became another self, a more primitive self... 706 00:57:46,440 --> 00:57:48,431 and the drug in some way... 707 00:57:49,160 --> 00:57:52,470 triggered the externalization of that other, more primitive self. 708 00:57:53,480 --> 00:57:54,913 At least look at my data! 709 00:57:55,200 --> 00:57:56,679 Of course. Maybe tomorrow afternoon-- 710 00:57:56,760 --> 00:57:59,672 Don't patronize me! It's just possible I'm not mad, you know! 711 00:57:59,920 --> 00:58:02,036 I'm asking you to make a small quantum jump with me... 712 00:58:02,120 --> 00:58:04,270 to accept one deviant concept... 713 00:58:04,360 --> 00:58:07,636 that our other states of consciousness are as real as our waking state... 714 00:58:07,720 --> 00:58:09,358 and that that reality can be externalized! 715 00:58:09,440 --> 00:58:10,429 You're screaming. 716 00:58:10,520 --> 00:58:11,839 I've gotten this patronizing shit... 717 00:58:11,920 --> 00:58:14,036 from Arthur and Mason for three months. I'm sick of it! 718 00:58:14,360 --> 00:58:17,875 We've got millions of years stored away in that computer bank we call our minds! 719 00:58:18,000 --> 00:58:21,595 We have got trillions of dormant genes in us, our whole evolutionary past. 720 00:58:21,680 --> 00:58:23,352 Perhaps I've tapped into that! 721 00:58:24,000 --> 00:58:26,992 I just want to get back into that tank and repeat the experiment. 722 00:58:27,080 --> 00:58:31,119 The most elementary laboratory behavior! Repeat the experiment. Confirm it! 723 00:58:31,800 --> 00:58:34,712 I would like other responsible scientists with me when I do it! 724 00:58:34,800 --> 00:58:37,075 I would like a little consensual validation on this. 725 00:58:37,600 --> 00:58:41,070 We may have demonstrated a whole new force in nature! 726 00:58:41,480 --> 00:58:44,950 For God's sake, don't you agree it merits further investigation? 727 00:58:45,040 --> 00:58:46,837 I have the tapes, notes and everything at home. 728 00:58:46,920 --> 00:58:49,480 What time would you like to come and look at the stuff tomorrow? 729 00:58:50,600 --> 00:58:51,828 2:00, 2:30. 730 00:58:54,360 --> 00:58:56,555 I just want to get the girls. I'll be right back. 731 00:59:34,840 --> 00:59:37,308 -I'll get it, I'll get it. -No, no, I will. 732 00:59:38,560 --> 00:59:40,915 It's 8:30, so get washed and changed right now... 733 00:59:41,000 --> 00:59:43,514 and I don't want any trouble from either of you tonight. Got it? 734 00:59:43,600 --> 00:59:44,635 Hello? 735 00:59:45,080 --> 00:59:47,116 Oh, Mason. Thank you for calling. 736 00:59:47,320 --> 00:59:48,992 I assume you've spoken to Arthur. 737 00:59:49,720 --> 00:59:52,188 No, no, I just got back from dinner with the kids. 738 00:59:52,840 --> 00:59:55,752 Well, I just don't know what to say. 739 00:59:55,840 --> 00:59:58,638 I think you're absolutely right. He's on the verge of a breakdown. 740 00:59:58,720 --> 01:00:02,235 He was here all afternoon and carried on like a madman and then just disappeared. 741 01:00:02,320 --> 01:00:05,630 Ordinarily I wouldn't be this panicky, but I just am very worried. 742 01:02:11,400 --> 01:02:14,198 -What's the trouble? -There's an animal loose in the basement! 743 01:02:14,720 --> 01:02:15,994 What kind of animal? 744 01:02:16,320 --> 01:02:17,833 Monkey, I think! 745 01:02:40,840 --> 01:02:42,398 Charlie! Charlie Thomas! 746 01:02:43,320 --> 01:02:44,548 Where are you? 747 01:02:46,280 --> 01:02:49,317 Hey listen, we've got some kind of animal loose here at B-building basement. 748 01:02:49,400 --> 01:02:51,914 I'm heading into the north corridor leading to the boiler room... 749 01:02:52,000 --> 01:02:53,513 so you guys come down the other way. 750 01:02:53,600 --> 01:02:55,955 Now, watch your step. He's a pretty good-sized ape. 751 01:02:56,040 --> 01:02:58,998 Call the animal rooms and find out what the hell he's doing down here. 752 01:03:27,000 --> 01:03:28,672 Must be in here somewhere. 753 01:03:31,160 --> 01:03:32,718 I'm gonna take a look up here. 754 01:05:18,440 --> 01:05:19,555 What the.... 755 01:05:19,640 --> 01:05:21,631 Get out! Get on out of here! 756 01:05:21,720 --> 01:05:23,756 Hey! Get on out of here! 757 01:10:53,040 --> 01:10:54,792 What were you doing in the tank room? 758 01:10:56,800 --> 01:10:59,837 I remember large fragments of what happened, but not all of it. 759 01:11:02,840 --> 01:11:04,671 You'll have to be patient with me. 760 01:11:05,720 --> 01:11:08,951 I've had Mason looking all over Boston for you all night. 761 01:11:10,160 --> 01:11:11,593 It's okay. I'm all right. 762 01:11:20,760 --> 01:11:23,991 I suppose getting a call at 2:30 in the morning from the police... 763 01:11:25,160 --> 01:11:27,833 to the effect your husband has been found sleeping naked... 764 01:11:27,920 --> 01:11:30,275 in the city zoo might have caused you some concern. 765 01:11:30,560 --> 01:11:31,993 Yes, I think you could say that. 766 01:11:32,080 --> 01:11:35,470 And Mason, writing to you this whole time that I'm having a nervous breakdown... 767 01:11:35,560 --> 01:11:38,074 and you figured I'd finally flipped out altogether. 768 01:11:40,000 --> 01:11:43,959 I'm sorry, Emily. Forgive me. I know what a harrowing day I've caused you. 769 01:11:44,040 --> 01:11:46,190 I suppose you've been sitting here all this time... 770 01:11:46,280 --> 01:11:48,350 trying to figure out how to get me to a psychiatrist. 771 01:11:48,760 --> 01:11:50,352 As a matter of fact, I have. 772 01:11:50,440 --> 01:11:53,238 I don't know how you've put up with me all these years. 773 01:11:55,520 --> 01:11:56,589 I loved you. 774 01:12:00,640 --> 01:12:04,474 My God, Emily, I don't know how to tell you this. I really don't. 775 01:12:04,960 --> 01:12:07,190 The implications are staggering. 776 01:12:07,360 --> 01:12:09,874 Apparently I entered a very primitive consciousness. 777 01:12:09,960 --> 01:12:12,599 All I can remember is what was comprehensible to that consciousness. 778 01:12:12,680 --> 01:12:15,911 I don't remember, at least not clearly, how I got out of the tank room. 779 01:12:17,080 --> 01:12:19,036 The first thing I remember are the dogs. 780 01:12:19,120 --> 01:12:22,237 I followed a pack of wild dogs to the zoo. That's how I got there. 781 01:12:24,200 --> 01:12:27,670 In the zoo, I hunted down, killed, and ate a small sheep. 782 01:12:31,200 --> 01:12:33,839 I was utterly primal. I consisted of nothing more... 783 01:12:33,920 --> 01:12:36,798 than the will to survive, to live through the night... 784 01:12:37,240 --> 01:12:38,514 to eat... 785 01:12:39,480 --> 01:12:40,708 to drink... 786 01:12:43,520 --> 01:12:44,635 to sleep. 787 01:12:48,360 --> 01:12:51,033 It was the most supremely satisfying time of my life. 788 01:12:54,720 --> 01:12:56,358 I may have killed a man tonight. 789 01:12:58,320 --> 01:12:59,514 I remember... 790 01:13:01,640 --> 01:13:03,119 beating on a.... 791 01:13:11,440 --> 01:13:14,238 You don't know the trouble I had getting these clothes. 792 01:13:14,320 --> 01:13:16,390 I had to go down to the security office. 793 01:13:18,440 --> 01:13:20,954 They want you to call the security office right now. 794 01:13:21,040 --> 01:13:24,077 There was some kind of ape loose in your isolation tank room tonight. 795 01:13:24,160 --> 01:13:27,436 Do you know anything about that? This ape almost killed a security guard. 796 01:13:28,040 --> 01:13:30,759 You didn't bring some ape down to that tank room tonight, did you? 797 01:13:35,480 --> 01:13:38,278 Your watch and stuff are in your jacket pocket. You all right? 798 01:13:39,640 --> 01:13:40,834 Is he all right? 799 01:13:41,160 --> 01:13:43,071 Tell Mason what you've been telling me. 800 01:13:43,240 --> 01:13:45,470 I want to hear Mason's views on all this. 801 01:13:46,920 --> 01:13:49,070 I think Mason's views will be predictable. 802 01:13:51,400 --> 01:13:53,630 My God! There it is... 803 01:13:55,400 --> 01:13:59,439 a protohuman. The first and the original, truly human form... 804 01:14:00,640 --> 01:14:04,076 tiny, perhaps four feet high, completely furred... 805 01:14:04,520 --> 01:14:08,069 chimp-like, but erect. No knuckle-walking. Shorter arms. 806 01:14:08,160 --> 01:14:12,631 He's moving along so gracefully. There's two, three of them. 807 01:14:13,760 --> 01:14:15,318 Bipedal, tiny.... 808 01:14:25,280 --> 01:14:28,238 Killing, I'm killing a goat. 809 01:14:28,320 --> 01:14:29,548 I'm killing.... 810 01:14:29,960 --> 01:14:32,838 I'm eating hot flesh. 811 01:14:32,920 --> 01:14:34,672 I'm eating the blood of a goat. 812 01:14:38,200 --> 01:14:39,428 Are you okay? 813 01:14:40,480 --> 01:14:41,629 Beautiful. 814 01:14:41,760 --> 01:14:42,829 Beautiful. 815 01:14:43,160 --> 01:14:45,390 It sounded like he was having a bad trip to me. 816 01:14:45,600 --> 01:14:47,989 Some of these tank trips can get pretty creepy. 817 01:14:50,440 --> 01:14:51,919 What the hell was that? 818 01:15:44,760 --> 01:15:46,716 Did I wake you? It's Emily. 819 01:15:47,520 --> 01:15:49,954 Eddie, I'm in a kind of wild panic. I need to talk to you. 820 01:16:02,480 --> 01:16:04,550 I don't know how even to put this into words... 821 01:16:04,640 --> 01:16:06,949 but I'm beginning to think that what happened to you... 822 01:16:07,040 --> 01:16:08,871 was not just a hallucinatory experience. 823 01:16:08,960 --> 01:16:12,748 I've got this gut feeling that something phenomenological did actually happen... 824 01:16:12,840 --> 01:16:15,229 that there was some kind of genetic transformation. 825 01:16:15,320 --> 01:16:18,756 I don't know why I think this, in defiance of all rationality, but I do. 826 01:16:18,840 --> 01:16:22,230 And now that I do, I'm terrified. I mean really terrified. Petrified. 827 01:16:22,320 --> 01:16:23,389 So am I. 828 01:16:23,480 --> 01:16:25,596 I don't want you doing this experiment again next week. 829 01:16:25,680 --> 01:16:27,159 I have to find out if it actually happened. 830 01:16:27,240 --> 01:16:28,639 I'm asking you to put the experiment off... 831 01:16:28,720 --> 01:16:31,109 until we understand a little more, in order to minimize the risk. 832 01:16:31,200 --> 01:16:33,430 You can't understand this without working back from the event. 833 01:16:33,520 --> 01:16:35,795 But you may be causing yourself irreversible genetic damage! 834 01:16:35,880 --> 01:16:36,949 We're not dealing with genetics! 835 01:16:37,040 --> 01:16:39,235 We're beyond mass and matter here, beyond even energy. 836 01:16:39,320 --> 01:16:40,992 What we're back to is the first thought. 837 01:16:42,360 --> 01:16:44,316 I'm trying to tell you I love you. 838 01:16:45,040 --> 01:16:46,234 I know that. 839 01:16:47,600 --> 01:16:50,876 And I'm trying to tell you, this is an all-bets-are-off sort of thing. 840 01:16:51,480 --> 01:16:54,916 We may be opening a black box that may scrap our whole picture of space-time. 841 01:16:55,000 --> 01:16:56,672 We might even have a link to another universe. 842 01:16:57,040 --> 01:17:00,350 For God's sake, Emily, you're a scientist. You must know how I feel. 843 01:17:02,520 --> 01:17:04,317 Yes, I know how you feel. 844 01:17:07,240 --> 01:17:09,800 It's very late, Eddie. Would you like to stay here tonight? 845 01:17:12,520 --> 01:17:15,432 I could do with a little love and a little reassurance right now. 846 01:17:16,680 --> 01:17:17,999 You'll stay, won't you? 847 01:17:54,960 --> 01:17:58,270 If I come out of that tank anthropoid, I'll be in a very primitive state... 848 01:17:58,360 --> 01:18:01,716 and impossible to relate to, so sedate me while I'm still in the tank... 849 01:18:02,000 --> 01:18:04,594 otherwise you'll have to chase me around and subdue me. 850 01:18:04,680 --> 01:18:05,715 Okay. 851 01:18:06,200 --> 01:18:09,237 I'll tell you one thing, you come out of that tank looking like an ape... 852 01:18:09,320 --> 01:18:11,356 and I'm going over to Mass. Mental and commit myself. 853 01:18:12,760 --> 01:18:15,399 If it happens, we'll bring him down with a big bolus of Amytal. 854 01:18:15,480 --> 01:18:18,472 What do you mean "if it happens"? Everybody keeps saying "if it happens!" 855 01:18:18,560 --> 01:18:21,677 Do you think something is gonna happen? Because I'd like to know. 856 01:18:23,960 --> 01:18:25,837 I'm sorry. I'm just nervous as hell. 857 01:18:26,760 --> 01:18:27,829 Listen, so am I. 858 01:19:28,800 --> 01:19:29,869 Anything happen? 859 01:19:30,400 --> 01:19:32,277 I just checked him 10 minutes ago. 860 01:19:33,600 --> 01:19:35,113 Did you order chicken or turkey? 861 01:19:35,280 --> 01:19:36,872 I hope chicken is all right. 862 01:19:36,960 --> 01:19:39,315 Look, I've got nearly 11:00. That's more than two hours now. 863 01:19:39,400 --> 01:19:41,072 I think we should stop this. 864 01:19:41,480 --> 01:19:43,118 I'll tell you frankly, I'm really frightened! 865 01:19:43,200 --> 01:19:45,589 We could be screwing around with his whole genetic structure! 866 01:19:45,680 --> 01:19:46,999 Now how do we stop this? 867 01:19:47,080 --> 01:19:49,150 -Can you bring him down? -He's gonna be sore as hell. 868 01:19:49,240 --> 01:19:50,468 We should never have let him do it! 869 01:19:50,560 --> 01:19:52,596 I don't know how we let him talk us into this. 870 01:19:52,680 --> 01:19:54,716 We were humoring him, but we know he's not crazy... 871 01:19:54,800 --> 01:19:56,438 and we all know, deep in our hearts... 872 01:19:56,520 --> 01:19:59,512 that he may be onto something that is beyond our own comprehension! 873 01:19:59,600 --> 01:20:02,319 Now, because I believe him, I want this thing stopped! 874 01:27:30,600 --> 01:27:31,919 His signs are all good. 875 01:27:32,000 --> 01:27:34,275 He'll probably sleep a day or two, come out a little stuporous. 876 01:27:34,360 --> 01:27:36,032 He's got a whopping load of drugs in him. 877 01:27:36,120 --> 01:27:38,429 It's not uncommon for a psychedelic experience like this... 878 01:27:38,520 --> 01:27:39,714 to whack you out for a couple of days. 879 01:27:39,800 --> 01:27:41,995 You'd hardly call this just a psychedelic experience. 880 01:27:42,080 --> 01:27:44,036 His heart is good. His pressure is good. 881 01:27:44,120 --> 01:27:46,270 I'm more worried about you than I am about him. 882 01:27:46,360 --> 01:27:47,395 I'm all right. 883 01:27:55,200 --> 01:27:58,237 Of all the goddamn men in this world, why do I have to love this one? 884 01:27:58,320 --> 01:27:59,719 I can't get him out of me. 885 01:28:00,320 --> 01:28:03,118 Do you know how many men I tried to fall in love with this past year? 886 01:28:03,200 --> 01:28:06,351 No matter who I'm in bed with, I have to imagine it's him or nothing happens. 887 01:28:06,440 --> 01:28:08,396 No matter who I'm eating with or walking with... 888 01:28:08,480 --> 01:28:10,914 there's always this pain because it isn't him. 889 01:28:11,360 --> 01:28:12,952 I'm possessed by him. 890 01:28:16,560 --> 01:28:17,993 Oh, it's crazy! 891 01:28:19,640 --> 01:28:21,631 I think that's the way it's supposed to be. 892 01:28:21,720 --> 01:28:23,199 But he doesn't give a damn about me! 893 01:28:23,280 --> 01:28:26,078 Emily, you're the only thing he cares about outside of his work. 894 01:28:27,640 --> 01:28:30,996 I was never real to him. Nothing in the human condition was ever real to him. 895 01:28:31,080 --> 01:28:32,274 He's a truth lover. 896 01:28:32,400 --> 01:28:36,359 Reality to Eddie is only that which is changeless, immutably constant. 897 01:28:37,240 --> 01:28:40,391 What happened to Eddie tonight, that was Eddie's idea of love. 898 01:28:42,160 --> 01:28:43,752 That was consummation. 899 01:28:44,720 --> 01:28:47,393 He finally got it off with God. 900 01:28:47,480 --> 01:28:51,598 He finally embraced the absolute, was finally ravished by truth... 901 01:28:51,680 --> 01:28:53,671 and it goddamn near destroyed him! 902 01:28:55,720 --> 01:28:57,836 He never loved me. You knew him as well as I did. 903 01:28:57,960 --> 01:29:01,236 We were all bits of transitory matter to him. 904 01:29:03,480 --> 01:29:06,836 All right, now, you're going into shock. I'm going to get you something. 905 01:29:20,880 --> 01:29:24,111 We reached a point tonight where physical science just breaks down. 906 01:29:24,200 --> 01:29:25,599 We're in blue skies! 907 01:29:25,680 --> 01:29:28,478 Tonight was history, and what are we gonna do about it? 908 01:29:28,560 --> 01:29:30,073 I'm gonna do nothing about it! 909 01:29:30,520 --> 01:29:32,317 Tonight scared the hell out of me! 910 01:29:32,400 --> 01:29:33,958 That tank just blew up! 911 01:29:34,280 --> 01:29:37,158 Whatever happened inside that tank released a hell of a lot of energy. 912 01:29:38,400 --> 01:29:41,995 For God's sake, let's drop this goddamn thing. I don't want to talk about it. 913 01:29:42,160 --> 01:29:44,879 I can't help it! You may want to go to sleep right now... 914 01:29:44,960 --> 01:29:47,758 but the way I feel I don't expect to go to sleep for a year. 915 01:29:47,840 --> 01:29:49,717 I'm on fucking fire! 916 01:29:50,240 --> 01:29:53,869 I am in there mopping up the goddamned tank room and I would like to know why! 917 01:29:54,560 --> 01:29:56,357 Do you believe in supernatural agencies, Mason? 918 01:29:56,560 --> 01:29:57,834 No, sir, I do not! 919 01:29:58,360 --> 01:30:01,636 Then what we saw tonight was a physical phenomenon... 920 01:30:01,720 --> 01:30:04,393 an inexplicable physical phenomenon! 921 01:30:04,480 --> 01:30:07,153 If it's phenomenological, then it's explicable. I've got to know why. 922 01:30:07,240 --> 01:30:08,434 Let me talk, for Christ's sake! 923 01:30:08,520 --> 01:30:10,909 I have been in there mopping up that goddamn tank room... 924 01:30:11,000 --> 01:30:12,149 for the last three hours-- 925 01:30:12,240 --> 01:30:13,434 I don't want to think about it! 926 01:30:13,520 --> 01:30:15,272 I can tell you what I would like to do! 927 01:30:15,360 --> 01:30:17,476 We have got to repeat this with other human subjects! 928 01:30:17,560 --> 01:30:19,073 We need a selective sample. 929 01:30:19,160 --> 01:30:21,993 We will put up a notice in the student union for volunteers. 930 01:30:22,080 --> 01:30:25,072 And get five or six subjects and go back to square one with them... 931 01:30:25,160 --> 01:30:26,593 and step up the doses of the drug... 932 01:30:26,680 --> 01:30:29,717 in a graduated fashion and check them against Eddie's values! 933 01:30:30,320 --> 01:30:33,630 We could even get a grant, for Christ's sake! 934 01:30:33,720 --> 01:30:35,950 The big moral stand... 935 01:30:36,080 --> 01:30:39,959 and here you are, willing to use an untested drug on innocent human beings! 936 01:30:40,040 --> 01:30:41,314 Please stop shouting! 937 01:30:50,560 --> 01:30:51,595 How are you? 938 01:30:52,840 --> 01:30:54,671 Would you like to go back to sleep? 939 01:30:56,600 --> 01:30:57,669 Yes. 940 01:30:59,040 --> 01:31:01,349 Would you mind if Mason had a quick look at you first? 941 01:31:03,680 --> 01:31:04,829 It's a good idea. 942 01:31:08,120 --> 01:31:10,111 Maybe you ought to have a quick look at him, Mason. 943 01:32:11,240 --> 01:32:12,753 Oh, I hope it isn't the kids. 944 01:32:14,240 --> 01:32:15,275 Hello? 945 01:32:19,120 --> 01:32:21,156 Everything's fine, Arthur. He's fine. 946 01:32:21,760 --> 01:32:23,955 -It's Arthur. Are you fine? -Yes. 947 01:32:25,360 --> 01:32:28,272 Arthur, I'll call you back when I'm more awake. Everything's fine. 948 01:32:33,400 --> 01:32:35,038 God, I wonder what time it is. 949 01:32:36,680 --> 01:32:38,033 I should call the kids. 950 01:32:39,840 --> 01:32:41,956 I can't tell you how much you mean to me... 951 01:32:42,400 --> 01:32:45,551 how much I need you and the kids. I just wanted you to know that. 952 01:32:45,960 --> 01:32:49,077 You saved me. You redeemed me from the pit. I was in it, Emily. 953 01:32:49,640 --> 01:32:52,359 I was in that ultimate moment of terror... 954 01:32:52,440 --> 01:32:54,112 that is the beginning of life. 955 01:32:54,480 --> 01:32:55,629 It is nothing. 956 01:32:57,080 --> 01:32:58,957 Simple, hideous nothing. 957 01:33:00,680 --> 01:33:03,990 The final truth of all things is that there is no final truth. 958 01:33:05,640 --> 01:33:09,189 Truth is what's transitory. It's human life that is real. 959 01:33:09,280 --> 01:33:10,508 I don't want to frighten you, Emily... 960 01:33:10,600 --> 01:33:13,068 but what I'm trying to tell you is that, that moment of terror... 961 01:33:13,160 --> 01:33:16,391 is a real and living horror, living and growing within me now... 962 01:33:17,520 --> 01:33:20,273 and the only thing that keeps it from devouring me is you. 963 01:33:20,640 --> 01:33:22,517 Why don't you just come back to us? 964 01:33:25,240 --> 01:33:28,630 It's too late. I don't think I can get out of it anymore. 965 01:33:29,520 --> 01:33:31,909 I can't live with it. The pain is too great. 966 01:33:40,200 --> 01:33:41,315 Defy it, Eddie! 967 01:33:41,400 --> 01:33:43,709 You made it real. You can make it unreal! 968 01:33:44,240 --> 01:33:45,559 If you love me, Eddie... 969 01:33:45,640 --> 01:33:46,755 if you love me! 970 01:33:46,840 --> 01:33:48,478 Eddie! Defy it! 971 01:35:30,960 --> 01:35:32,154 I love you, Emily. 972 01:38:30,280 --> 01:38:31,315 English